Written masterfully once upon an evening by
@mitthradiumn The founder of "the lower case"


and drawn meticulously in Microsoft Paint by
@ankapolo the co-something of "the lower case"

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Utilizing the latest of eastern, western, south-eastern and equatorial medical research into the psyche and how it's endless nuances, mysteries, contradictions and wonders function, we decided that's way too hard and instead made this X-men thing. Just pick your favorite and recieve a 2-bit psuedo-psuedo-psychoanalysis by an untrained handsome man.

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Rogue

Conflicted and obsessed with hereditary identity and rather listlessly flicking between the only two thought patterns the human mind is apparently capable of 'bad' and 'good' but with time, guidance, and a little love you'll learn of the third, "nobody cares about what you call your thought process, nobody cares about your thoughts either, and nor should they. To define oneself one must first be a self, so stop debating what type of person you are/ought to be and go find out which one you actually are. Grey's not working for me, just a heads up.

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Prof. X

There was a study performed that concerned "gifted" children and their behavior. The most interesting and telling test was where two groups of children were both assigned the same task: answer questions correctly for rewards, with the choice of choosing harder questions for more rewards. The difference was that in group A the question was answered correctly, the child would receive praise in the form of "Wow, you must be really smart!". The second group also received praise upon answering correctly, with the slight difference of phrasing in "Wow, you must of tried really hard at that!". The results were telling: nearly every child in group A whose intelligence was praised decided to answer the same difficulty question for the same amount of rewards, while group B overwhelmingly would risk the more difficult question. The conclusion drawn was that subjects hesitation in group A was due to risk of answering incorrectly reflecting poorly on their previous title as intelligent, whereas anyone could try hard, intelligence being a part of you and effort simply being something you do.

A lot could be drawn from these results, like the emotional mechanics of "gifted child syndrome" (primarily referencing chronic underachievement and procrastination) but rather the crux of the point here is if your favorite hero as a child was the bald handicapped one who thought real hard or some shit I shudder to imagine how either 1. hideously dull your sex life is 2. how terrifyingly sharp and zipper it may be. By the way I saw you looking at hats, you don't pull off hats.

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Jean

Your personality type truly is exemplary of the modern age's spirit, that somehow simultaneously marches ever onward on their two-fold path: being boring as fuck and bipolar as fuck at the same time.

i mean scott bitch really

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Wolverine

There's a good chance that Wolverine is your favorite X-Man because you really don't care too much about X-Men, but claws are cool and he's an X-Men you remember from movies. That's alright. Wolverine's alright. Good job. Good.

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Gambit

Devil recognize his own.

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Storm

Keenly aware of your surroundings in both the micro and macro sense, often active in social issues. You have a strong sense of right and wrong, but are distracted from fulfilling your full potential by long standing insecurities and the long standing habit of spending all day fucking around with lightning. All day.

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Cyclops

Oh my god, no there will be no "family night" at the steakhouse Scott - the only stake in our relationship will be the one I perch your head on as I march it in front your weeping mother. Fuck.

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Beast

Muppet Babies has been rescheduled to the 6:30pm time slot.

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A note from the creators:

When we think in a macro scale about why this content matters, and why efforts were made to let it exist, there is a tingle of pleasure that comes with knowing that this utter nonsense will be chained to the block along with scientific dissertations, crypto analyses and other highbrow shit.

Source for Beast

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