✍️Short Story I wrote: "Getting Skunked"

When I was a kid, my grandparents had a summer cottage my family spent 2-3 weeks at each summer.

And one of my biggest fears after the sun went down?

Was getting sprayed by a skunk.

Also as well, the cottage was where my family played cribbage. And in the game of cribbage there's a "skunk line" - and a player can "get skunked".

So - as I got old enough to learn how to play it?

I also laughed about that, because by then I was already smoking weed...

But - it did increase my paranoia.

Now?

Not only was I afraid to get sprayed by a skunk at the cottage?

I was also afraid to get skunked by playing games instead of being serious.

And if you enjoy Scrabble as much as I do?

You probably know that having an "S" on your tile rack is better than having a little "Z" carved into your forehead...

And you probably also know that you can play a word with an "S" in it, and use the the "S" to pluralize another word already on the board - and get the points for both words.

So - when I saw that my uncle played "tink" - and used a blank for the "k"?

And I saw I had the other blank and the actual K - and all the other letters to spell skunk?

Instead of pluralizing "tink"?

I used "skunk" to turn "tink" into "stink".

And thanks to the fact the "S" was on a double word score and the K was on a triple letter?

I won The Game.

I was finally able to skunk my uncle in a board game, even though it wasn't cribbage.

And he HATED losing.

Especially at Scrabble.

Especially to me.

Especially since he had tried to play "felto" as a word earlier - and I challenged him because I knew it wasn't a word, so he lost a turn, which put him behind.

Especially since when he brought up that my win wasn't fair because he tried to cheat and I caught him - and I said "I know, getting skunked in Scrabble must .... *tink"

Moral of the story??

Getting skunked in cribbage is better than being sprayed by a skunk.

But being skunked in Scrabble by your smartass nephew?

That - really stinks.

And it's always better to be a smartass than a dumb ass.

*tink

^The definition of "tink" is "the sound the world's smallest mic makes when you drop it on a ceramic tile."

Now - time to go smoke some funky skunky smelling green stuff, and think of more ways to turn rotten puns into entire stories...

Or - continue to be so immature and lazy that I don't even bother looking for a job.

Because I have one - I'm an artist, and a writer, and a musician.

And I can even act - trust me.

But - so far there hasn't been much interest about me starting my own Only Fans channel...

So, in the meantime I'm just waiting for the final decision on which federal agency in a country I don't live in is going to put me on payroll - and doing my job to the best of my ability each day.

I hope it ends up being the Ministry of Silly Walks, I'd love to meet John Cleese....

*Update - just before publishing this story, I got a call from the Japanese ambassador to Nigeria.

They have hired me at the Ministry of Silly Woks!

They're the government body in Japanigeria that's in charge of fried food that tastes funny, or that may cause people to laugh.

So of course - the guy dealing with assuring the quality of fried foods?

Has to be OK with getting pretty baked every day.

Finally, I won't be green with envy over my friends who grow weed.

Back in the day, we all used to be pretty fun guys after all...

🤣

🎨 "Mushroom Mandala" I painted in 2014. 12 x 12 inches, acrylic paint on canvas.