Sword Art Online Season 1 Episode 1 (A Satirical Recap)

in #anime7 years ago (edited)

Among all of the anime I've heard about in recent time, the one anime I've heard so many bad things about is "Sword Art Online." From overpowered protagonist to a plot twist that doesn't make sense, to just story decisions that make people go "what the fuck!?" Now I've personally never watched the anime myself and figured maybe I should give it a try and decide for myself it this one can impress me or disgust me like everyone else. So for the next few days, I decided that I will watch every single episode of the first season of the anime. I'll do satirical recaps for every episode and then do a full review once I complete everything. Soooo... if you're familiar with this anime, on a scale of 1 to 10. How fucked am I?

(Also, side note all the pictures used on this recap is my screen shot so no sources were provided)

EPIDSODE 1 FINAL FANTASY XXXV

Long long ago in the not so far future of uh... future Japan, a virtual reality MMO RPG has just been released and is taking over the country. Enter Kirito your average, handsome, not at all overpowered protagonist of the series. Kirito knows more about the game than most players because he was a beta tester. Kirito enters the game using the virtual boy 4000 and meets Krillin, I mean uhh... Klein.

Klein gets hit in the balls by a boar.

Bromance occurs as the virtual sun sets in the distance. But uh oh, the logout option is missing!? How are the players going to get out of this virtual reality filled with magical creatures and graphics even Final Fantasy XIV would be jealous of? How are they going to go back to their normal, boring, existential lives!? How is Klein going to eat the shrimp wasabi whatever pizza he ordered earlier? The answer to these questions... are going to be answered... By a teleportation spell! Every player in the game is teleported into the town square.

Death mage person the physical embodiment of EA appears in the flesh... well, virtual flesh. It turns out if you die in the game you die in real life, and the only way to get out of the game is to complete all 100 floors. All the players are understandably upset.

Also, their real identities are revealed via a magic mirror, I guess catfishing is not allowed in this game. The mob starts to panic and Kirito is like, "fuck this Kline we gotta go." But Kline is like, "but... what about my friends?" Kirito contemplates for a moment...

He say's "You know what? fuck you, fuck this game and fuck your friends I'm out." Kirito runs off into the sunset, well actually just on the next town.

What would happen next? Will Klein and his friends survive? Will Kirito finish the game? What about the Pizza!? Join me again next time! On the next SAO SATIRICAL RECAP!

Thank you very much for reading and I hoped you enjoy.
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