[EXPLICIT] PokemonGo Eat a dick!
Ok, Well... If you are not familiar with the new phone App (by Niantic,Inc. [IOS/Android]), it is great. By the creator's own video, the app was designed to get kids off the couch and out into the world again, with a memorable childhood theme of "Pokemon". I like that, and that's exactly what should have happened...
So I live nearby a small strip mall and convenience store (AM/PM BTW) and I' don't really exercise but my 2 year English Bulldog does. She can't get enough of that shit! So it's too hot in the day so I take her out at night, on my way over to the store to pick up some cans (beer). It's become a regular institution and she gets right anxious if we don't go a few times a week. I took her out and we saw the security guard who we've begun to know well, and he was complaining about all of the traffic. I looked around and what do you think I saw... grown ass adults putzing around in their cars, half-parking, the engine running and the lights on, moving from parking apace to parking space as if they were trying to find the space next to Taylor Swift's parked car. It was close to midnight! So one car stops, and an idiot pops out of the passenger side and runs a few laps around the lot. In the meantime, a car full of half-wired geeks goes driving by, loudly cranking the Pokemon theme song from years gone by! After a careful look around, there was at least a dozen of these pricks strolling around the parking lot like a combination of silicon valley and the "living dead. For fuck sake! Did the cable go out or what? The guard was about to go crazy because he is used to only drug dealers trying to hang out after about 8PM. Now, they have an entire new army of wannabe enthusiasts, roaming the local neighborhoods. And these are not just teens, some of them are probably AARP members,!! Way to go Niantic, not only is the amount of police calls about to triple, these idiots are hanging out for an hour at a time, just spewing car exhaust as they quest for some "awesome" imaginary character. For fucks sake, are they being paid by the oil companies, or what?
Recently, Venice Beach in Southern California, has been closed down to PokemonGo enthusiasts and it has become a menace to law enforcement who now find random strangers, albeit well-meaning, roaming around city streets at all hours of the night. Others have been found inside offices, funeral homes, and in alley ways and maybe right in your own back yard. Yesterday, you would have called the police and now, they think it's OK, well, FUCK OFF! It's not OK and probably putting some people at risk from the NRA folks who don't react well to a bunch of people roaming around outside their daughter's window. So if you get woken up in the middle of the night, to some person crawling over your fence for some PokeBalls, resist the urge to shoot first! On the other hand, if you can't find your drug dealer, he's probably with them! PokemonGo, Eat a Dick!