The Luxury of Taking Our Time
I found myself remembering my Auntie this afternoon, as I feverishly pounded my way through a bunch of tax related bookkeeping that — like so many other things in life — had to get done, because there's a deadline and blah, blah, blah....
One of the phrases she most often would say — to friends, and family, and even me — was "I don't want to be rushed!"
Perhaps she taught me more about taking your time than any other person in my life.
I spent a lot of time at her house, from about age six till her passing away when I was 38. Life was slow there; deliberate and not rushed.
Granted, she had the luxury of financial stability and security, but it was also facilitated by the choice to not need to do and have everything, all the time.
Perhaps the "thing" she valued the most was being able to approach life at whatever speed she felt like.
There we were, this dignified and quiet lady in her 80's, with her nephew of about 30... eating and truly enjoying dinner for an hour or maybe 90 minutes, actually enjoying and tasting the food.
Sitting on the back patio, simply watching nature go by; listening to birdsong in the trees and watching clouds drift by.
The idea of things that had to be done with urgency and deadlines were a million miles away. Which was not to say that my Auntie didn't get things done. But she was a model of efficiency who made every movement, thought and effort count, rather than flailing about randomly, as some many people I know tend to do.
I have carried much of what I learned from my Auntie forward into life... where it has served me well in terms of personal well-being but perhaps not so much in the context of a world that's always in a hurry, and needs everything to be done... yesterday.
I think we miss an awful lot of the beautiful nuance of being alive, if we're always in a hurry... on the entire spectrum from doing our work to making love.
If our minds are already preoccupied with "the next thing" we need to rush towards, how can we possibly be fully present in whatever we're part of, in this moment?
What have we been "trained" to become? All this rushing seems like little more than a way to get people to live in a constant state of reactivity, rather than being afforded the chance to make deliberate and informed choices with their lives.
My Auntie also taught me a lot about discernment; particularly as it applies to what you allow into your life. Specifically, don't agree to — or plan to — get so much done it requires every waking moment and every ounce of energy you have to get it done!
Many years ago, I spent an entire day sitting on a friend's garage roof, just talking about life. She was a clinical psychologist and practicing counselor... and one of the many things we covered was the idea that many marriages/relationships fail because the two people simply don't have TIME to "just be" with each other.
Instead, they become like the proverbial "ships in the night," just passing in the hallways of their busy and rushed lives, but not connecting. And no, "scheduling" intimate time is neither intimate nor very connective...
We need to slow down to where life can actually flow, rather than be jammed down our throats. And maybe that means giving up a few shopping trips, and buying things from the second hand shops, so you can work fewer hours... and agreeing to HAVE less so you can BE more!
I certainly don't claim to have the answers to everything!
But I do believe that taking our time should not be seen as a luxury, but as an essential part of a well-balanced life.
Thanks for stopping by, and have a wonderful week ahead!
How about you? Does your life feel rushed? Do you wish you could take everything more slowly? When was the last time you took a day — and an hour — to just stop and BE? Leave a comment if you feel so inclined — share your experiences — be part of the conversation!
(All text and images by the author, unless otherwise credited. This is ORIGINAL CONTENT, created expressly for this platform — Not posted elsewhere!)
Created at 2025.03.30 23:06 PDT
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