An open letter to the person I can't be friends with...
As I sit on my couch writing out this letter, I can’t help but think how much easier life would be if you and I could be friends.
If I were to just accept your desire to be best buddies, then I wouldn’t have to say the hard things…you know, like telling you that you’re not ready to be my friend. I know it’s not fun to hear, but you need to learn more about life and how to build healthy relationships before you and I can claim BFF status.I’m sorry, but I have to set boundaries and I will say no to you every now and then. I can’t be that “fun friend” you want because, well, you just need to grow up!
That’s right, I said it…You’re far too immature to be my friend.
I’m sure as you read this, there’s a part of you filling up with indignation.But my dear, sweet child, I can’t be your friend.
I must be your parent first.
Sure, I long to have a close bond with you where we can laugh and have fun. I truly enjoy those moments when I see your eyes light up in happiness. And I flat out love the playful banter as we tease each other or debate about which movie is the best.
But those moments can’t make up our whole experience together as child and parent.
In the fleeting years that you will live under my roof, God has given me the job of teaching you all the wisdom I’ve learned over the years. And more importantly, all the wisdom He’s placed in the Bible for us to live by.Kiddo, I’ve made mistakes that I sincerely want you to avoid! And I’ve rubbed elbows with amazing people who taught me how wonderful it is to carefully build our character and seek after God with abandon. Those are the kind of people who change the world for the better!
And you can be a world changer too, if you learn how!
God wants me to guide you as you learn to properly handle anger. As you wash those despised dishes, I’m praying you see how important a good work ethic is and how far that will take you in the workplace. And when I ask you to apologize to your sibling, I’m trying my hardest to teach you the value of kindness and how we need more safe people and fewer rowdy renegades.I’ve seen enough heartache to know that I desperately want you step out into the world prepared the best you can be for whatever may come your way. Because unfortunately, the storms of life will drown us if we don’t know how to swim the seas of emotions and feelings.
Let me teach you to swim!
I really do want you to be happy. But what I want even more is for you to be filled with joy! Happiness comes and goes depending on if we get what we want or if life is easy, but I can show you where to find strength and peace and joy that stays no matter what.So, yeah, as much as it stinks, I simply cannot be your friend. Not right now at least. Right now, I absolutely have to focus on doing my job.
Whether you understand it or not, the tedious day in and day out parenting is the greatest act of love I can offer you.
Honestly, parenting the way God wants is hard- really hard- but it’s a sacrifice I’m willing to make. And in the long-run it will deepen our friendship when that day comes. But in the meantime, please accept my God-given role of authority in your life.
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