Steem4nigeria Accelerator Contest Week 84: Dealing with "Frenemies"

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Hello friends

Life seem to be a lecturer teaching us each day to watch out for how we are treated

Based on the introduction given, define"frenemy" in your own words

The word frenemy in my own words simply means people who pretend to be our friends but they are not. They end up hurting us either by betrayal or face to face confrontations or backstabber.

Frenemies are people we simply can not suspect from onset having hidden agenda why they are close to us .

They even go as far as getting information from us just to use it against us. In the real sense they are not our friends.

Have you had any experience with such people who claim to be your friend, if yes, share with us?

Oh yes I have and there are many instances like that in my life. Thank God I have erased such kinds of people from my life.

I will share a story with you. Are you ready?

Many years back , I had this male friend that was really close to me. Guess what? We were just friends even though we were close and he was single at that time.

He comes to my house to spend time with me and my other female friends. One day one of my friends living with me ask me for a favor, she said he colleague at work needed a place to stay for the week because she was looking to rent a new space.

As the loving and understanding person I am, I agreed. This friend of hers came over at our hoise and started staying with us. One week became 3 weeks. One day my male friend visited and I introduced him to the new friend in our house. When he left, she asked me if he was my boyfriend, I told her No but I told her we are close. Then I asked her why she was asking, I also asked her if she likes him and she said no. She also said he was never her spec.

I didn't know this lady took my phone one day to collect the number of this my male friend and started communicating with him. She finally moved out of our apartment to her new space which is also in the same compound.

She started feeding him with lies. She told him that we are bad girls and that we go out with different men. She even told him that if he has interest in me he should forget about it because the men in my life are not his class. He told him a lot of lies.

One day, this my male friend got so upset at the many lies she constantly fed him and took the step to ask me. I was so surprised that a girl we took in as a friend could do this.

How can one guard ourselves against frenemies early enough before they harm us

There is no general rule on how to guide ones self but I have theses few things to say.

To protect ourselves from such people, we need to set boundaries.. know the kinds of information you release to your friends because you never can tell if they are frenemies. There are things that should not be said, keep those information to your alone.

Another way to protect ourselves is to ensure that we don't make friends any how. Be selective about choosing your friends by watching them closely first.

Relate with them at basis at which they relate with you nothing like going the extra miles or doing too much.

Who is a true friend and how can you identify one?

A true friend is one who is trustworthy, loyal and has your interest always.

A true friend is one who tells you the truth in love, talks good about you even when you are absent and defend your interest.

A true friend of can be identified by their character. A true friend considers you and is nut always at the receiving end.

I would invite my friends to join me @ninapenda @fannyscober