**Steem4nigeria Accelerator Contest Week 91: Not what you think.

Greetings friends! How are you today? I believe you are all fine as I am. I appreciate @steem4nigeria for organising this contest, and I am happy to add my voice to this topic "Not what you think". Please, carefully read this article to the end.

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What do you understand by being "Misunderstood"?

The word "Misunderstood" is a past tense of the word misunderstand which means to have a wrong interpretation or to give the wrong meaning to a statement, whether verbal or written. Therefore, when we say someone is misunderstood, it simply means that the word mentioned or the statement given is not comprehended by the listener.

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Have you found yourself in such a situation? If yes, kindly share with us your experience.

Yes, I have found myself in such a situation. Some years back, I was with a lady whom one of my friends is dating. I counselled her and encouraged her to always define whatever she is doing in life, even the relationship that she is in. Is she into the relationship for fun or marriage? The answer to this question will guide her journey in the relationship and we ended our discussion
A week later, my three other friends, including the boyfriend of the young lady we had discussed with, and I were discussing when her boyfriend accused me of trying to spoil their relationship. He said that I was trying to tell the lady to quit the relationship because he would not marry her.

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How did you feel and how did you handle the misconception?

I felt ashamed of myself because this issue came up at a point when I was championing the discussion and I knew very well that that was not what I meant. So, I tried to explain what happened that led to this advice but nobody seems to understand me. At the end of the day, I have to kneel down and apologise to my friend, saying I am sorry for what happened and promise that such will never happen again. Even with the apology, I was not comfortable for the remaining time we were together that day.

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Is there any advice you would love to give to your readers so they don't find themselves in your shoes

The advice I would love to give everyone is that anytime we are talking, we should be mindful of our listeners and ensure that we bear the following in mind:

• Our statements should be in clear terms considering the level of understanding of our listeners. Avoid using ambiguous words
• We should think before we talk.
• Demand feedback and offer clarification if you are not understood.
• Don't be too fast when talking to ensure that you carry your listeners along.

Conclusion/Invitation
It is not a good experience to be misunderstood. Therefore, we must be mindful of our listeners and ensure that our words are understood. I invite @vickyson, @joymm, @sadaf02, @harshima10 and @ruthjoe to join me in this contest.

CC
@steem4nigeria

10% beneficiary to @steem4nigeria

Thank You All