"SLC-S24/W3 - Powerful Debate | Love & Arguments"

Hello my dear steemian friends

Assalamu Alaikum

I am @saifuddinmahmud from Bangladesh. I am very excited to join the learning challenge. The challenge name is Powerful Debate -Love vs Arguments. The challenge arranged by @tammanna. I am writing about this. I wish everyone will like my post.

I select the topic on the topic-01

The story is between Saif and Farha. They both loved each other selflessly. Their relationship started with friendship, it didn't take long for it to turn into love. After five years, their relationship blossomed into marriage. The family started off beautifully. From the kitchen to the TV remote, everything was sweetly shared.

But with time, small problems suddenly started to grow bigger. Farha became a little angry due to busyness, fatigue, expectations, and Saif became quiet. There were arguments, disagreements, no one would talk to anyone. Because, no one wanted to go to this place of 'I'll say sorry first'.

One morning, after Saif left for the office, Farha found a small note under her pillow while making the bed.

It was written, "Farha, maybe my words or behavior hurt you. I'm really sorry. I don't want our love to be a wall of pride. You are the most beautiful part of my life. Be well."

Farha's eyes got wet. At that moment, she realized that apologizing first doesn't mean being small, but rather making love bigger.

Farha also wrote a note for Saif, "The way you taught me to love, I am also learning to forgive. From now on, there will only be love between us, not arrogance."

That afternoon, the two of them held each other's hands and promised to apologize to each other if there was a misunderstanding.

Source

• My debate in light of the above motivation.

Why its important to husband should say sorry first -

• Socially and culturally, men are given the role of leadership. Therefore, as a responsible husband, saying sorry first to resolve a conflict stabilizes the relationship.

• If men say sorry first, it gives women a sense of security and respect. This deepens the relationship.

• If ego is maintained in a married life, the relationship is damaged. A real man tries to maintain the relationship even if he is small.

Maybe the wife should apologise first beceause -

• Relationships are mutual. Whoever makes a mistake should apologize first whether it's the husband or the wife.

• If women have the mindset of “why should I apologize first”, then it shows ego, which can ruin the relationship.

• Marriage is a team journey. If the wife apologizes first, it is not a sign of weakness but a sign of maturity.

Question: Reveal the simple thinking of your mind and show us that in any quarrel or problem that arises between a couple, the first thing that men do is always admit their mistakes and apologize to their wives in order to keep their relationship intact. Is this right or should the one who is at greater fault in the quarrel first admit his mistakes and apologize to his partner and try to fix the relationship?

Answer

Source

This is a deep and important question that involves relationships, responsibility, and mutual understanding.

• Men should apologize first to make the relationship work.

This idea is largely shaped by social and cultural context. In our society, men are expected to be grown up, patient, and humble in order to maintain the relationship. Many see this behavior as a way to save the relationship. There are also some positive aspects behind it. If the man can control himself and prioritize the relationship, it can contribute to the stability of the relationship. It can make the wife feel safe and valued. Apologizing can often initiate a positive change in the relationship. However, if this idea repeatedly places responsibility only on the man, even when he is not at fault, it creates a biased and unbalanced relationship. If this continues in the long run, it is harmful to the relationship.

• The one who is more to blame in an argument will apologize first.

This approach is based on justice, responsibility, and self-awareness. It holds both parties accountable for their behavior. It creates a relationship of respect and mutual understanding. There is an equality and balance in the relationship, where no one carries a one-sided burden. This approach builds responsibility and builds respect for each other, which in the long run strengthens the relationship.

• In my view, the balanced path is the best because,

When there is a problem or a fight in a relationship, the most important thing is to be self-critical, take responsibility, and be sensitive to each other's feelings. The one who is more at fault will apologize first, which is fair. If one feels that the relationship is valuable, and the partner has been hurt, then apologizing without calculating the blame can be a beautiful and mature behavior.

So not only men or only women, but anyone who realizes that a mistake has been made or that the situation needs to be fixed can be the first to apologize, show love for their partner, and a sense of responsibility for the relationship.

Question: Where many people think that in a fight, the husband should be the first to say sorry and their wives should be the first to resolve the conflict and mend the relationship. Do you agree with this view or do you think it is different in your case? Express your own feelings.

Answer

Source

It opens the door to many important thoughts about responsibility, love, ego, and understanding within a relationship. Many people think that the husband should be the first to apologize during a fight because he is the leader or big person in the relationship.

On the other hand, some think that wives are more sensitive, so they should take the initiative to fix the relationship first.

But my feelings and perspective are a little different and balanced. I think that relationships are not one-sided. It is a shared journey. Here, “who apologizes first” should depend on the situation, on a sense of responsibility, and on respect for each other.

Why I disagree with the idea of ​​​​one-sided apology-

• The basis of equal partnership only survives and develops when both people consider themselves equal. The one who made a mistake should apologize first whatever it a woman or a man.

• Many times people get into a competition over “who apologizes first.” This loses the main tone of the relationship. Apologizing does not mean losing. It is a mature form of love.

• Many women are given the burden of believing that they are the primary responsibility for maintaining a family, relationship, or love. But this creates an imbalance. Both parties need to take an active role in understanding and resolving the conflict.

• The value of mental health and feelings is important. If one party is always trying to fix the relationship, then eventually fatigue sets in. Stress builds up. This disrupts the balance of the relationship.

My feelings:

I believe that love is all about laughing, crying, making mistakes, and fixing them together. A strong relationship is built when, after a fight, both parties realize their mistakes, apologize, and try to understand each other. It is not who apologizes first, but who can reach out first to save the relationship.

Question: However, in this case, would it be wise for both the husband and wife to admit their mistakes and apologize to each other in order to preserve their relationship, or would it be wiser to continue to maintain their egos and continue to cause unrest in the family day after day? Which do you think is right?

Answer

Source

Maintaining a husband-wife relationship means building a beautiful coexistence through mutual respect, understanding, and self-criticism. Admitting mistakes and asking for forgiveness. Married life is full of disagreements, misunderstandings, and sometimes emotional behavior. But admitting these mistakes does not mean surrender, but rather giving importance to the relationship and strengthening it in the future.

When someone admits their mistakes, they prove that they are mature and know how to put the relationship above their ego. Both asking for and giving forgiveness relieve the burden on the mind. This increases respect and empathy for each other, which is essential in married life. If the couple admits their mistakes and mends the relationship, then a kind of stability is maintained within the entire family. Children also learn good behavior.

On the other hand,

Keeping pride and creating unrest is the wrong path. Pride destroys relationships. Pride is the biggest enemy of relationships. It gradually consumes love, weakens understanding and creates distance at the same time. Disturbance spreads poison in the family. When husband and wife treat each other with pride, it creates a toxic environment not only in their relationship but also in the entire family. Especially the mental development of children is hampered by this. While protecting pride, many reach a point from which there is no way back. Going on the path of separation or breakup can be a sad outcome.

In my opinion, the most correct and wise thing to do is to admit mistakes, apologize to each other, and maintain relationships through mutual understanding. Pride can never be a source of lasting peace or happiness. Happy relationships are built on humility, respect and love, not on pride or stubbornness.

Thanks to everyone who read my post. Take care your relationship.

My invitation friends
@akbarmia
@hasank
@azad45

Allah Hafej