"SLC-S24/W6 - Powerful Debate - Yes or no/pros and cons"
Do you believe in having expectations and setting boundaries for relationship?
Yes, I do believe in having expectations and setting boundaries in a relationship. Not in a way that restricts someones freedom or love, but as a foundation that helps both partners understand each other better and protect their emotional well being.
Expectations and boundaries are like guardrails on a road, they help us stay on the path and avoid damage. Without them, misunderstandings grow, feelings get hurt, and trust weakens between them.
Craft a debate or a real life story to buttress you point.
Arsalan came from a wealthy family where everything seemed perfect on the outside, but his life was filled with heavy responsibilities. When his father became seriously ill, he made Arsalan promise to marry Saba, a simple and kind girl from a modest background. Arsalan and Saba barely knew each other, but out of respect for his father’s last wish, Arsalan agreed.
Their marriage began quietly, with a mixture of duty and uncertainty. Arsalan’s feelings were distant; he told Saba one night, “I don’t know if this will work. We hardly know each other, and honestly, this marriage feels like an obligation more than a choice.” Saba looked down but answered gently, “I understand, Arsalan. I want to try. Maybe in time, we’ll find something real between us.”
In the early days, their conversations were polite and careful, like two strangers trying to walk a delicate path. Over time, small moments brought them closer.. a shared smile over dinner, a quiet conversation about their childhoods, the comfort of being with someone who listened.
One afternoon, Arsalan stopped by the kitchen and said, “The food smells good today.” Saba smiled and said, “I want you to feel at home here.” Arsalan nodded, feeling something soft stir inside him.
But their happiness was fragile. Arsalan’s mother, Fareeda, never accepted Saba. She believed Saba was not right for her son and quietly began to interfere. She whispered doubts and suspicions into Arsalan’s ears, planting seeds of mistrust.
Arsalan, caught between his growing affection for Saba and his mother’s pressure, started to change. When Saba had to visit her sick mother, Arsalan’s tone turned sharp.
“Why do you leave without telling me? What are you hiding?” he asked one evening. Saba’s voice trembled, “I told you, my mother is unwell. I’m just trying to help her. Why don’t you trust me?”
Arsalan looked away, struggling with his own confusion. Instead of talking openly, he let his doubts grow.
Fareeda’s manipulations deepened, and soon Arsalan was convinced that Saba had betrayed him. One night, filled with anger, he confronted her harshly, “How could you do this to me? I trusted you!” Saba’s tears fell quietly as she pleaded, “I would never hurt you. Please just listen.”
But Arsalan’s heart was closed. Without giving Saba a chance to explain, he told her to leave the house even though she was carrying his child.
Saba left with a heavy heart but held her head high. Alone, she raised their daughter with quiet strength, never showing bitterness even when the pain was unbearable.
Years later, Saba returned not to beg for forgiveness, but to claim her daughter’s rightful place. It was then that Arsalan finally understood the truth that his assumptions, silence, and lack of trust had destroyed everything they had.
It is to have expectations and set boundaries in a relationship, but only if you're open and honest about them. Without trust and clear communication, expectations can turn into painful misunderstandings. Boundaries are there to protect feelings, but if they become too rigid, they end up pushing people away instead of bringing them closer.
When we don't talk about our expectations or if our boundaries are unclear, love can suffer. But at the same time, having too many strict rules without understanding can also drive people apart.
Arsalan and Saba’s story teaches us that love needs a balance being open about what we expect while also respecting each other’s limits. Without that balance, even the strongest love can fade away in silence.
Elaborate on the PROS (advantages) and CONS (disadvantages) of expectations and setting or not setting boundaries in relationships.
✅ PROS (Advantages) of Expectations and Boundaries in Relationships:
When we clearly talk about our expectations and set our boundaries before getting too close to someone in a relationship, it becomes easier to understand each other. For example, if I tell my partner from the beginning what I like, what I dislike, and what things are important to me then there are fewer chances of hurting each other’s feelings.
We get to know what makes our partner happy or upset. This helps us take care of their emotional well being too. Like if I know what food they like or how they like to dress, I can make small efforts to make them feel special and loved.
It also builds trust. When we openly share what we expect and what we feel, the other person starts trusting us more. They know we’re not hiding anything. There’s no need to guess what the other person is feeling because everything is shared with honesty.
❌ CONS (Disadvantages) of Expectations and Boundaries in Relationships:
But sometimes, expectations can become too much. Like if someone starts making strict rules in a relationship “You have to do this,” “You have to give me that lifestyle,” “Only then I’ll be happy” this can make the other person feel trapped.
For example, some girls expect the boy to be fully settled, have a good job, give them a rich lifestyle, even if he’s still working hard to reach that stage. These heavy expectations hurt the relationship. The boy might feel stressed and feel like he’s never enough.
Another big problem comes when we don’t talk clearly about our expectations. That leads to confusion. The partner doesn’t understand what we want, and we start feeling disappointed.
Like, maybe I expect loyalty, but I don’t express it clearly and when something goes wrong, I get angry, and the other person doesn’t even know what they did wrong.
Sometimes, we build emotional walls we create too many rules, too many boundaries. It becomes like a condition: “Only if you do this, then I’ll stay with you.” This blocks love and creates misunderstandings.
For example, a girl may expect too much from a boy who is not settled yet. She wants a certain lifestyle, and instead of supporting him, she builds a wall with her expectations. This ruins relationships.
That's it from today’s blog. I hope you liked it. With best wishes. Now I would like to invite:
@neelofer, @norat, and @sualeha to participate in this amazing contest.
Thanks a lot for reading.
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