Hello My Steemain Friends ,

How are you. I hope you people of steemian are good and enjoy your life . Well I am well. May God bless you all. Today I am writing about an interesting Steemit Engagement Challenge S24- W1: which is all time my favourite topic “Powerful Debate - Tangled Emotions" this amazing challenge organised by @sitaraindaryas . So, in this post I am going to share my point of view about this topic.

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When a girl gets married, she leaves behind many lovely relationships and memories, believing that the man she is going to will love her a lot, respect her a lot and the girl is also mentally prepared to sacrifice everything for her husband. Both of them want "only love and trust in a relationship".

When a new marriage takes place, the wife feels weak because the whole environment, all the relationships are new for her and she has to adjust to the new environment, understand everyone's behavior, feel shy, all this goes on moving forward with a mixed feeling. But on the contrary, when the husband is in his own house, he is never able to understand this mental change, he can understand it only when he becomes the father of a daughter and when he bids farewell to his daughter. Otherwise, perhaps tears have no value.

To maintain any relationship, love and trust are needed the most. Husband and wife are the two wheels of a vehicle, the vehicle runs smoothly only when both the wheels move together.

A wife argues with her husband about his relationship with other girls.

There is a deep silence in the room even after the presence of the husband and wife. Both are trying to keep themselves busy in some work and there is a storm of thoughts going on in both their minds. To break this scary silence, the husband says

Husband : "Do you want to ask me something?"

Wife : In a calm posture

Husband : What is going on in your mind, how will I know unless you tell me?

Wife : Actually you do not know what I am thinking or you are pretending to be unaware.

Husband : An expression of worry comes on the husband's face and he asks what are you talking about.

Wife : You don't give me time like before, I have seen your female partner's messages on your phone. Now don't ask why I touched your phone? Because husband and wife have rights over each other's things. I regret that I wish I had not touched your phone and I would have been in a false dream that my married life is going on very happily.

Husband : Now you don't give me time, your whole day is spent with children, family, household chores, kitchen. But a man has some desires that he should come home tired and talk to his wife but you don't have time.

Wife : This responsibility is not mine alone, it is the responsibility of both of us. I also feel like spending time with you, talking to you. You tell me your entire daily routine, I should also talk to you about my thoughts. It is not only your desire, a wife also has a desire. You have to do the same thing for 24 hours every day, you have to fulfill one responsibility after another.

You should have talked to me, we both could have found a solution to this problem together. But you found the solution alone and went in search of a new life partner, to entertain yourself. Leaving me in the clutches of this responsibility, did you really ever love me? Because if you had loved me, you would not have thought only about yourself, you would have thought about me too.

Husband : I am very ashamed of my mistake.

Wife : If I had cheated you like this, what would have been your behavior towards me?

Husband : Maybe if I had thought and solved this problem with you, then we could have lived our old days again, but now it is too late, I have moved on.

Wife : She remained quiet, very quiet, staring at the ceiling with a bitter, pale smile because now everything was out of her hands.

She was confused about where she went wrong while fulfilling all the responsibilities. This situation leaves a question for a woman that is it wrong to fulfill one's responsibilities? Is it not the husband's duty to shoulder the responsibility and not to look for his happiness outside.

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According to story, a neglected wife is calm after knowing about the betrayal by her husband, this is the outer peace. But inside her mind and heart, there is a storm of thoughts. The reason for which the husband neglected her, cheated her, this family was given by him only. The family should run well, the husband should not have any problem, the husband should not have any worries about the house, that is why wives immerse themselves in work. Wives do not have time to show off, because they are surrounded by so many responsibilities that perhaps they do not have time for themselves.

I am saying this from my personal experience, I have two children, a husband but today the responsibilities are so much that I do not have time to say Jaanu Shaanu. There is an age, love exists between everyone. But when the children grow up, the parents also have to behave in such a way that they do not become a laughing stock in front of the children, because it is not necessary that love is shown in front of everyone, it is a mutual relationship between the two, there is understanding between you.

According to me, the wife has shown emotional maturity in this story. Because the husband has cheated and now he is just putting forth his views to prove himself right. This is not his maturity, the maturity is shown by the wife. She is talking calmly despite such a big matter. If the wife had done the same thing, had she developed a relationship with another man outside?

If she had made a relationship with another man, would her husband have talked so calmly, would this maturity have been visible? Never, because the ego of husbands comes to the fore in every work. Every husband feels that whatever he does, he is doing it right. All the fault lies with the wives and this is their biggest mistake.

Of course emotional cheating is more dangerous, because it acts like a sweet poison which is given slowly and is not known, the effect of which is seen all at once and if someone cheats physically, then the man is the first one to defend him. Because in physical cheating only your body gets hurt and in emotional cheating even your soul gets hurt.

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The real cheating starts from the heart, when a person's heart starts getting attracted towards someone else, then he forgets that he has made some promises to someone close, to maintain the relationship. He becomes so careless towards his responsibilities, that he ignores the losses caused by it. He is ready to ruin a life just for a few moments of happiness. He neither cares about his wife's respect nor about his children's future, he only thinks about himself.

Emotional distances are always created by small things, which we realize slowly but after a long time. When a person does something that he has never done before. Like not caring for you, not talking to you, being on the phone all day, etc. Nothing changes suddenly, change happens gradually and by the time the partners understand this, it is too late. He has moved on in his other relationship and nothing remains except embarrassment and regret.

There are some subtle signs which make you realise that some emotional distance is being created such as:

• Ignoring each other's likes and dislikes

• not giving time to each other

• being lost in one's own thoughts

• being careless towards household responsibilities

• getting angry over every small thing

• being irritable.

If there is a very true and unbreakable love, which is full of trust. In which there is no need to speak words from the mouth, only through the eyes, facial expressions and gestures a person can know the heart. That trust, that love can avoid betrayal. But if there is even a thread-like distance between the two partners for a third person to come in. There is a possibility of betrayal.

A broken heart can be mended only by true love, faith, and true atonement, only by someone who really realizes his mistake, otherwise it takes only a second to break a heart and a whole life is spent in maintaining a relationship. And when once the trust is broken, it takes a lot of time and hard work to build the trust. Because the pain of a broken heart is unbearable and the one who can betray the trust once, can do it again and again. It is very difficult to trust this.

If I were a marriage counsellor, I would advise two married couples that they should not take any decision in haste. Everyone has the right to give or get a second chance because marriage does not only connect two relationships, it connects many relationships with each other. I tell any couple that communication is the best medium. You should speak your mind openly and also listen to the other person.

Because not every person is perfect, if you are seeing shortcomings in the other person, then it is possible that he/she is also seeing shortcomings in you and if you both really want to live with each other, then remove your shortcomings and if you take a decision in haste and separate, then what is the guarantee that the second partner you choose in future will not have any shortcomings.

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Because every human being has some or the other shortcoming. A perfect union is like walking around with a lamp in the dark. And first of all, you should examine yourself, are you perfect, are you the way your partner wants you to be, if you are like that then think a lot, then reach a decision and if you have children then definitely think about the future of the children, what is the fault of the children? They need both, how can they choose one of the parents.

I want to invite my friends to take part in this contest: , @sduttaskitchen , @chant , @dexsyluz , @stef1"

Cc : @fannyescobar , @vishwara

Thankyou 🙏

Greetings