My So-Called Life

In this crazy life of mine, I've come to develop plenty of quirky habits.

Sometimes I call them my superpower; it's the only way that would keep me from losing my sanity, or even something worse.

The silliest superpower I have is that I can make up dialogues for the animals around me, in my case, my cat overlords.

If animals could talk, or even behave like humans do, I'm sure I'd be admonished greatly by them for all the stories I make up and conjure the most absurd things about them.

^{Like the theory that my cat is actually a tanuki}

But it's kinda my 'cheat code' for communicating with my beloved cats, assuming they love me as much as I love them.

And what if you could replace all the sounds in your life with cartoon sound effects?

I think it would make an interesting sight for everyone to witness the interaction between me and my cats.

Life could also be much simpler and straightforward; a punch would genuinely sound like a punch. Cartoons can't quite get those backhanded slaps right, can they?

Another thing that keeps me sane is the perfect food combo at my favorite fast-food place, McDonald's: a Double Cheeseburger with fries and a Diet Coke, accompanied by a late-night comedy show.

All this, with my asthma inhaler in hand, because even laughing threatens to take my breath away. It's just too cruel to think that these kinds of things can happen.

It's understandable if nasty air or bad health can trigger respiratory issues. But to take the laughter out of me?

That's just cruel. I will find my way around it.

©Britt H.

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