Slap me in face and call me Tilly // Star Trek Discovery Episode 3 Review.

in #review6 years ago (edited)


First i want to stress that i had no intention of writing any more Star Trek reviews for the time being.. I did talk about it a few days ago so i didnt think there was a point.

Apparently there is. haha

The last episode i watched was directed by Jonathan Frakes (aka. William Riker from TNG) and that episode was surprisingly enjoyable. Who knew.
So i went into this new episode with expectations that are a bit higher then 0. Damn was i dissapointed from the get go..

Star Trek of old was always ahead of its time. It often had progressive ideas but it didnt shove them down your throat. It made you think. STD force feeds you.

5 minutes into the episode i was already facepalming and telling myself: "What in the fuck?"..
At that point i decided to write this review...

It didnt take long for idiot agenda pushing to take hold.... Tilly (The science officer) is racing around the ship, running a half marathon. She runs into some kind of ghost and stops for a minute or so.. Some bs discussion with the ghost happens (doesnt matter) and she starts running again, catches up on the group and wins the race?! haha.

A half marathon is 21km or 13 miles!

And this is the actor playing Tilly.



Im not saying shes fat, but she beat a 0% body fat Asian dude during a 21km race while standing around for a few minutes.. ROFL
Im not sure i could run a half marathon and im in 10 times better shape then her.. And im a guy..

Its simply body positivity idiocy that has no basis in reality. She even gets 3 affirmations of how amazing she is in the span of 2 minutes after winning the race..
Its exactly this kind of SJW crap that kills my enjoyment of the series.. I mean shes a cute girl, but theres no way in the world she could run 5km at pace, let alone 21km, chill out a bit, talk to a ghost and win in the end..

Moving on........

After that we get a dizziness inducing sweeping shot on the bridge of the ship.. The camera guy spins the camera so fast from face to face that you feel like you will fall off your couch. Terrible camera work that is there to convince you that the show is "high budget".

Then we move on to the Klingon world. One of the most iconic races of Star Trek and science fiction as a whole.
... Poor acting. Cotton-mouth pronunciations (due to crappy prosthetic) and awkward discussions.
But at least they gave them hair.

Still, the Klingons from 30 years ago in TNG look far better then the modern ones. With all the tech and experience in movie industry today, STD having inferior costumes makes little sense.

We move forward to some more Michael Burnham. I hate her character so i cant be objective here. All i see is her preaching to everyone. Supremely obnoxious.

I often wonder... If they were shooting for a dominant female lead.. How difficult it must have been to literally copy Sigourney Weavers "Ripley" or Kate Mulgrew "Captain Janeway"...

Those two were convincing from the plot standpoint. The writers convinced me that they were badass.
Even if i disregard the writers purposefully naming the main character of this show with a male name (Michael) for what ever stupid SJW reason, i still think shes a annoying, trash character.

If it Burnhams when i pee, do i have an STD?

... More forwarding

Michael talking to her half klingon half human buddy/love interest over a hologram was a pretty decent scene if it wasnt a complete rip-off of the Last Jedi Star Wars movie.. (Reylo and Kyren)

The rest of the episode establishes a love triangle between the Klingon Chancellor, Michael Burnham and Voq/Ash (Too complicated to explain)... There seems to be a child involved..
Some Klingons try to kill them, they win, a plot twist happens.... bla bla blo...

The fight scene was ok for a mediocre show but it doesnt really stand out in any way. TNG is still superior in every way. TNG might be cheesy but it feels more believable due to the angles they shoot from. STD feels like its in a haze. Nothing stands out.

Conclusion:

Sprinkle some SJW, add a bit of leftist agenda, rush the important plot points because you waste time on politics, wrap it all up in CGI cellophane and you get STD (The show and the disease) ..

Keep on Steeming and live long and prosper.

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